The Price We Pay for Family - 20

 

Cont...

The weeks after the funeral were hard. Life went on and eventually Uncle Sam couldn't dodge getting called back to Washington. So with a heavy heart and even heavier bags under his eyes Uncle Sam had headed back to work. AJ had watched him go. Sad, numb and angry. Not unlike himself. Not unlike any of them. 

Mama had thrown herself into the restaurant and charity work. She was trying to work through the grief. AJ wasn't sure it was working. 

Cass had become obsessed with his tablet, hiding away in his room always in his electronics. 

Sam had fixed almost everything that needed fixing in the house restaurant and boat that he could get his hands on. He was running from the grief. He never talked about it. Never mentioned it. He was just vacant. Mama said he did that after people he cared about died. 

Mama worked, Cass hid and Uncle Sam ran. AJ, AJ was pissed. 

He was pissed, and he was scared, and he was sad all at once. They had dared to come and steal his uncle from them. They had been watching waiting for an opening. AJ never wanted to feel that helpless again, never that scared, and it made him mad. 

He couldn't go outside anymore without constantly jumping at the slightest sounds, without regarding everything and everyone with suspension. They'd taken that from him. 

He wanted them to pay. He wanted them to burn. He wanted to not feel like a thousand eyes were watching him when he stepped outside. It hadn't happened yet. AJ was starting to worry it never would. The only place he felt safe was the old office. He couldn't think of it as uncle Bucky's room because thinking that made him think about everything else that went with it. But he spent most of his time there now. Flipping through books on the selves. Stacking the bulging journals in neat stacks. Looking over the photos and other eclectic items his uncle had. AJ pulled the door closed and then knelt down and pulled open his uncle's sock drawer. He carefully pulled out a small velvet box and an envelope. His uncle's family ring. 

AJ could remember when he first seen it. He'd been snooping in his uncle's room. It'd been close to his birthday and he was hoping to find some presents hidden away. That and his uncle's room was really interesting. 

Naturally he'd thought that the sock drawer was a good place to start. He'd been rifling through when he'd found the small velvet box. He'd pulled it out and popped it open.

 A ring. He'd been disappointed and confused. He was a teenage boy. He didn't want a ring. So he'd looked in the drawer again. He'd found an envelope with a letter in it. His disappointment complete,  AJ had decided to fill his curiosity. He hadn't even gotten the letter half-open when his uncle found him. 

"Pretty sure you're not supposed to be in here." Bucky had said, scaring AJ from where he stood at the door. 

"I didn't hear you come home." AJ had sputtered, calculating just how much trouble he was in. 

"No, I do believe you were too busy going through my drawers." Bucky nodded, dropping his backpack on his desk chair and caught AJ in an unreadable gaze, "So what did you find?"

 "A ring." AJ gulped, "And a letter." 

"Yes. Both from my sister." Bucky nodded. 

"You never talked about a sister," AJ said surprised. 

"Had. I had a sister. She passed away before I met you." Bucky corrected. 

"I'm sorry. I didn't know." AJ said softly. He tried to imagine a life without Cass in it and couldn't. How sad.

 "I never thought to mention it. But she gave that to her children. Before she died after she learned I was still alive." Bucky nodded to the ring box. 

"Was it hers?" AJ asked, interest piquing. 

"Yes. It was my mother's before that. It would have been mine had I not disappeared." Bucky nodded, "Now it's mine again." 

"What are you going to do with it?" AJ asked, looking at the ring. It was a simple thing. Gold band. Diamond stone. Not super flashy but it was nice AJ supposed. Not like those monstrosities now that seemed to only get in the way. Or that was what Mama said. 

"I don't know," Bucky admitted. 

AJ looked at him skeptically, "So you're not going to propose to my mom with this?" 

Bucky chuckled, "I want to. Not sure it's the right thing to do in the long run."

 AJ scoffed, "That sounds like an excuse. You two are happy together and love each other. I'm not seeing any huge problems."

 Bucky smiled and shook his head, "Maybe. I don't see it as that simple but maybe it is. I'll let you know when I do. Now," Bucky pulled AJ to his feet, "I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to be in here. Tell you what. I won't tell you mother you have been snooping but you have to help me fix the transmission in the truck." 

AJ groaned at the thought of having to deal with the second hand food truck his mother had bought with great zeal only to find that it was a disaster. But it was better than getting in trouble from his mother, "Okay. Sorry." 

"Come on. Let's get the groceries out of the car." Bucky said putting the letter and box back in his drawer and putting an arm around AJ's shoulder, "If we hurry we might be able to finish off the ice cream before your mom finds out." And just like that the issue had gone away. AJ hadn't thought about it afterward. Sure they had worked on the transmission on the truck layer but it hasn't felt like a punishment. But those simple days felt so far away. 

AJ looked at the small box, and it felt like he was holding the heaviest thing in the world. Carefully opening the small box the diamond ring glittered up at him. He carefully pulled it out, holding it up to the light. He'd never held it before. Always admired it from the box. It was light and in the band was engraved, Barnes Family. A family that is gone now. 

"AJ, honey I need you to-" Mom came in before AJ could hide the ring. She froze in the doorway staring at the ring in his hands. "Oh my- Where did you get that?" 

AJ looked up at her heartbroken face and then down at the ring, "Uncle Bucky had it." 

Mama let out a choking sound as she sank onto the bed next to him, "Can, can I see it?" 

AJ scooted over and handed it to her, "He was going to propose with it."

 "He never gave it to me. Said he had it though." Mama turned it over in her hands, tears building in her eyes.

 "I think he would want you to have it," AJ said quietly.

 Mama looked down at him with a sad but proud smile, "I think so too."

 AJ leaned back and watched her slide it on, "He said it was a family ring. Said it was his sister's."

 "Rebecca." Mama nodded, admiring it through tears, "He mentioned her once." 

AJ looked up at his Mama carrying the burden of work and business and family and grief and marveled at how she didn't drown under it all and whispered, "Did he ask?" 

Mama closed her eyes and pulled her hands tightly to her chest as tears streamed down her face, "Yes."

 AJ didn't need to ask what her answer had been. Years ago in an English or History class, which he couldn't remember, there was a quote from one of the English royalty that had stuck with him. The price for love is pain. And Mama had paid the price.

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